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The Cheeky Punt's Weekend Preview...
Having earned a few quid from backing Blackburn last weekend, he's at it again this week. There's also money on Joe Cole, West Ham and Stevie G. And a gag about Gary Glitter and Stoke...
Blackburn v Hull
I remember a particularly eventful visit to Hull as a Hartlepool fan some eight years ago when I was:
1 - Hit on the head with a bottle of Heinz Tomato Sauce (non-squeezy as well to add insult to injury, or injury to insult as it turned out).
2 - Chased around town a bit by the infamous Silver Cod Squad.
3 - Forced to travel home in a van with no windscreen courtesy of the aforementioned SCS.
I must admit that after that particular sojourn I never thought I'd be writing about the Tigers in the Premier League, particularly after Hartlepool had spanked them 3-0. But as they proved against Fulham last week they are here on merit and will be up for this.
However, so will Blackburn after their last-gasp win at Everton and you have to fancy Paul Ince's men to continue their 100% run. I personally won't be backing the home win at a rather skinny 4/6 but am well up for a bit of Rovers Half-time/Full-time action at 13/8.
Betting: Blackburn-Blackburn Half-time/Full-time at 13/8 (Skybet).
Fulham v Arsenal
Neither side impressed last week but while Arsenal were just so-so, Fulham put in a p*ss-poor shift away to Hull. If they bring that type of form to the party here I fully expect the Gooners to put 'em to the sword. Emmanuel Adebayor can plead for mercy in the press and kiss the badge all he wants but the only way he is going to get the fans onside is by peppering the old onion bag. The Togolese Terror is 9/2 to notch first and I reckon he's worth a dabble considering he bagged two at Craven Cottage last season.
Betting: Adebayor to score first at 9/2 (Betfred).
Liverpool v MiddlesbroughFernando Torres bagged a magical hat-trick against the Boro last season and also notched at the Riverside so it's no surprise that he's the man the bookies want to keep onside here. I'll probably end up regretting it but I'm going to pass on the Tapas-eating Euro 2008 winner and have myself a bit of 9/4 about Steven Gerrard scoring. The 'G Man' bagged 21 goals for the Reds last term and should be well rested after a leisurely summer spent buying Lacoste apparel and doing swish things with WAG better half Alex Curran.Betting: Gerrard to score anytime at 9/4 (Hills).
Newcastle v BoltonThe Mags will be in fine fettle after their commendable 1-1 draw at Old Trafford on Sunday. Better fettle anyway than my mate 'Irish' Gerry (who is actually from Basingstoke) and who had over three grand on the Red Devils to beat Newcastle at 2/7. When some wag bought him a bottle of Newcastle Brown Ale after the final whistle Gerry lived up to his fighting Irish roots by throwing said bottle at said comedian's foot, prompting one of the most amusing river dances you are ever likely to see. Home win for me here, probably two zip.
Betting: Newcastle to beat Bolton 2-0 at 13/2 (Skybet).
Stoke City v Aston Villa
Some bookies have already squared punters who have backed Stoke to go down, such was their ineptitude against Bolton last weekend. I don't think the camel coats will end up with egg on their faces either as there is more chance of Gary Glitter being our 2009 Eurovison Song Contest entry than Stoke staying up. Every man and his dog were on Villa to beat Citeh on Sunday and they did the bizzo thanks to an inspired second-half showing from Gabby Agbonlahor. The big fella is 50/1 to a hat-trick here and I see no reason why he can't got beeezerk again against a Stoke defence that is going to be exposed time and against this season.
Betting: Agbonlahor to score a hat-trick at 50/1 (Blue Square).
Tottenham v Sunderland
The Spuds were rank against Middlesbrough last week while Sunderland were unlucky not to take a share of the spoils against Liverpool so I can't have the home win at two's on here. I wouldn't back against them winning but they might make hard work of it and so a nibble on them winning from behind might be worth a look.
Betting: Tottenham 'To Win from Behind' at 13/2 (Boylesports).
West Brom v Everton
The Baggies put in a man shift at the Emirates on Saturday and will fancy the job against an Everton side who looked anything but world beaters against Blackburn. This isn't a match I'd whack my knackers to the chopping board and call with any degree of confidence but if you're asking me I reckon it smells like a big fat draw.
Betting: West Brom and Everton to draw at 11/5 (General).
SUNDAY:
Wigan v Chelsea
Chelsea really did look the Mutt's Nuts in taking apart Portsmouth last week and they look the goodest of good things to beat Wigan here at 4/9. Joe Cole is dancing to a different beat right now and this could be the year he finally comes of age. Get stuck into the 11/4 about him scoring at the JJB before it disappears.
Betting: Joe Cole to score anytime at 11/4 (Paddy Power).
Manchester City v West Ham
With an owner technically on the run from the Thai old bill and a manager probably wondering just what in Jesus' name he is doing there Citeh are a club in turmoil right now. They are 5/4 pokes to win on Sunday but I'd rather poke my own eye out with an egg whisk that get involved. West Ham are no great shakes but then you don't have to be to win at Eastlands these days so the 12/5 about an away win here looks a serious wager in my eyes.
Betting: West Ham to beat Manchester City at 12/5 (Stan James).