sport

The Page Which Is Too Much

A Four-Club Man
From The Daily Mirror:

'Chelsea skipper John Terry was last night described as the 'Zinedine Zidane of the Blues'. Boss Avram Grant hailed Terry's commitment to the cause and said: "John is loyal to his club - just like Zidane."

Number of clubs Zidane played for: Four.

Highest number of years Zidane spent at any club: Five.


Footballers, Eh?
From The Daily Mirror's story on Naarwich midfielder Matty Pattison being arrested for drink-driving:

'Mirror Sport understands Pattison visited a nightclub on Saturday night after the Championship side's 2-0 defeat at Sheffield United.

'And on Sunday, apparently still drunk, Pattison allegedly woke up and jumped into his car believing he was late for training.

'There was no training scheduled for that day. But wearing just his pants, a T-shirt and no shoes, Pattison began driving to the club's Colney training ground. He was tailed by police halfway through the journey after he was apparently spotted driving erratically.

'When the 21-year-old pulled up outside the Norwich training ground he was arrested after police were said to have found him unsteady on his feet and slurring his words.'


For Your Licence Fee Today
As reported by the BBC website:

'Fulham defender Dejan Stefanovic is wanted on loan by Fulham. (The Times)'


Answering Back
Asks The Sun:

'Why's [John] Terry parking in a disabled bay?'

To which the traditional answer is:

'Because I've got Tourettes you ***t'


For Your Licence Fee Today, Part Two
'Arsenal striker Emmanuel Adebayor has been branded the new Samson - because he has lost all his powers since having his hair cut and has not scored since the removal of his trademark braids. (The Sun)'

AC Milan might have something to say about that...


What Heather Said, Part One
"One thing that I've done that hasn't been for charity. 80% of my money goes to charity. And that's why people want to have a go at me - Heather Mills, speaking last October on GMTV.

"The wife accepted that had she had £2m to £3m in the bank in 1999 she is most likely to have put such a sum into an account earning interest. But the tax returns do not disclose any bank interest earned or only very small sums which are not consistent with holding £2m-£3m in a bank or banks. Moreover her tax returns disclose no charitable giving at all" - Extract from High Court's ruling on the Mills-McCartney divorce.


What Heather Said, Part Two
"We have been offered nothing, OK? Nothing! We go to court over my daughter. I'm not allowed to talk about it because it's a criminal act if I talk about my daughter. You have no idea what's going on. These figures are made up. £100m, £50m, £20m....How do you know if I even want any money?" - Heather Mills, speaking last October on GMTV.

"Nevertheless, as I have said, the wife is (or at least was) prepared to accept £50m in lieu of a claim for £125m. That, in my judgment, can mean only one of two things; either the claim by the wife for £125m is a reasonable claim, in which case the enormous drop of £75m to £50m is inexplicable, or, the claim for £125m is and was unreasonable, indeed exorbitant" - Extract from High Court's ruling on the Mills-McCartney divorce.


Headline Of The Day
'My Boys Are Bully-Proof Says Fergie' - The Daily Star triumph on a poor, poor day.

Non-Football Headline Of The Day
'Pornocchio' - The Sun on the woman that makes Yoko Ono look like the sensible choice for a Mrs Beatle.

Worst Headline Of The Day
'Alonso To Give Unied What Tor' - The Sun.

What The Newly-Rich Spend Their Money On
''It has been suggested, through Mr Hobbs, that food, wine and flowers should be put in at £20,280. In this connection the wife made much of the very large bills for flowers that were run up during the marriage. That may be. But, in my judgment, that is and unsure guide. In any event she in her evidence recognised that the bill for flowers during the marriage was much too high as to what is needed in the future. I shall allow £30,000 p.a. for food, wine and flowers.'

Non-Football Quote Of The Day
"But I regret to have to say I cannot say the same about the wife's evidence. Having watched and listened to her give evidence, having studied the documents, and having given in her favour every allowance for the enormous strain she must have been under (and in conducting her own case) I am driven to the conclusion that much of her evidence, both written and oral, was not just inconsistent and inaccurate but also less than candid. Overall she was a less than impressive witness" - Mr Justice Bennett gives Heather the brush off.

Rumour Of The Day
'Fabio Capello will recall Theo Walcott from the international wilderness two years after his only appearance for England's senior side and include the Arsenal winger in his provisional 30-man squad for next week's friendly against France in Paris' - The Guardian.

Quote Of The Day
"It's true that Hleb saw Vigorelli and they went out from the Melia Felix but it's not true that they went to talk to Inter Milan. They went for an ice-cream" - Vincenzo Morabito explains why the Arsenal midfielder left the team's hotel in a taxi on the night before the Champions League tie with AC Milan.


Thanks to today's Mediawatch spotters: Adil Mahmood. If you spot something that belongs on this page, mail theeditor@football365.com, putting 'Mediawatch' in the subject field.