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The Timber Gossip
CURBS ON THE WAY?
Not the biggest shock in the world, but The Independent reports that Alan Curbishley is teetering rather at West Ham, with Slaven Bilic hovering menacingly behind him, probably playing his guitar or smoking or doing something equally cool.
More on this one here.
BREAKING NEWS! BREAKING NEWS! BREAKING NEWS!
As we type, word reaches F365 Towers that Roman Pavlyuchenko has landed at Heathrow, ahead of scribbling his name on a Spurs contract later on today.
If you believe The Times, this means that Dimitar Berbatov will finally be allowed to break the evil White Hart Lane Shackles and make his move to Manchester United.
The paper reports that Spurs have reached a verbal agreement with United to sell Berbatov, once the Pavlyuchenko signing is confirmed.
With them both in Monaco for a lovely jolly/the European draws, David Gill and Damien Comolli will apparently meet to thrash out the final details of the deal.
ROBINHO DEAL OFF?
Some of the more twitchy tabs have jumped all over Ramon Calderon's quotes yesterday, when he claimed he was sure Robinho would be staying at Real Madrid, and not moving to Chelsea.
"The coach and the sports director want the player to stay and I am sure he will" said Calderon.
The Daily Mirror and The Daily Star take this as Calderon blocking the deal, casually forgetting that the Madrid president is a professional bulls**t merchant, and anything he ever says should be taken with an entire mill of salt.
The Sun seem more confident though, claiming that a £31million deal will go through very shortly indeed.
Indeed, Chelsea themselves seem pretty cocksure, what with them offering Robinho shirts for sale at the club shop.
WENGER HAS £30m TO SPEND
The famously fiscally reticent Arsene Wenger has been told by his board that there are piles and piles and piles of cash available for him to spend should he so desire.
Director Danny Fiszman said: "It's not our decision who he (Wenger) spends money on, nor will it ever be our decision.
"If he said to us, 'I want this guy and he's £30million, can I buy him?', the answer is yes. Absolutely yes.
"We totally back him, it's his decision. If Arsene found the right player he would buy that player, but at the moment his hasn't."
Of course, this is a bit like saying that, because The Gossip Column is male and in theory has the capacity, we will do the rude thing with Maggie Gyllenhall in the near future.
In theory possible, but in reality it ain't gonna happen.
More details on that one just here.
MILNER TO EVERTON
You'd think that the news of a decent Premier League player becoming available would set off hilarious, comedy alarms at the increasingly desperate Goodison Park, and going on the word in the papers this morning, you'd be damn right.
Various papers suggest that David Moyes will make a bid of around £10million for James Milner, after the winger handed in a transfer request the other day.
However, always one to go against the crowd, The Sun suggests Milner will be an Aston Villa player by Monday, with them winning the £12million race for the player.
Meanwhile, The Sun claims Everton will wrap up the signing of Nigerian striker Victor Obinna, while The Daily Mail reckons Everton and Spurs are two of the clubs looking at Henrik Larsson after the veteran striker and all-round good egg fell out with the Helsingborgs chairman.
Finally, The Guardian reckons Everton will sign Galatasaray midfielder Mehmet Topal if they don't manage to get Joao Moutinho.
CITEH AGREE TO PAY UP
Manchester City have confirmed via the magic of their website that they have agreed to pay the buy-out clause in Espanyol full-back Pablo Zabaleta's contract.
That will cost them around £6.4million, and if you want more details then you'll have to click roughly here.
AND THE REST...
Paul Ince is set to nab Keith Andrews from his ex-club MK Dons for £1.3million...Stoke's Tony Pullis has completed a second raid on relegated Reading by snapping up Ibrahima Sonko...Ipswich have paid £200,000 to sign Fulham's German right-back Moritz Volz, 25, on loan until the end of the season...West Ham, Fulham and Stoke are in talks to sign former Birmingham striker Walter Pandiani, 32, from Osasuna...Carlton Cole is considering his future at West Ham amid fears he will be the next of up to seven players to leave...Leicester City have turned down bids from three clubs for £5million-rated defender Joe Mattock...Adam Johnson has sparked a 12-man Championship chase by telling Gareth Southgate he is not prepared for another season on the sidelines at Middlesbrough...
